Radio Free Kirkopolis

I know it, you know it, Lance knows it, virtually the entire cycling community knows it, and now France knows it (well, they probably knew it all along just failed and / refused to believe it).
Lance Armstrong has been cleared of his doping charges.
I really hate to sound like a broken record on this one, after all unlike Capn’ Bighead (Bonds) the evidence in Lance’s defense was overwhelming while the evidence against was shotty at best. So without wasting a bunch of bandwidth on blockquotes, just click HERE if you want to read more about it.

For the most part I have Wednesdays off at work, so I tend to do a lot of catch-up on the things that I’ve missed throughout the week- you know laundry, errands, bathing… and catching up on ye olde blog.
I like doing that on Wednesdays (by the way, I’ve always had trouble spelling the word ‘Wednesday,’ seems like it should be Wensday, oh well- back to the topic at hand) since my two favorite humor sites, The Onion and SportsPickle do their updates on Wednesdays. Makes me almost feel like I’m part of the elite. Boy delusion is a blissful state don’t ya think.
So I’ll do my best to post as often as I can, but if you rely on me for scheduling purposes (and by that I mean you are a very sad person) look for updates on hump day.

One thing that’s always annoyed the piss out of me is seeing a “Director’s Cut” of a movie. They usually, if not always, do nothing more than make the movie suckier. What most directors don’t understand (due to their freakishly large egos I suppose) is there was a reason that the 75 minutes of extra footage didn’t make it into the movie in the first place. "Apocalypse Now- Redux" is a pretty good example of a great move gone bad, and don’t even get me f**king started on George f**king Lucas and what he did to the original “Star Wars” f**cking trilogy. Ridley Scott did the same with the DVD of “Blade Runner” putting in a craptacular amount of extra (and un-necessary) footage that just make the movie mind numbingly boring and unwatchable. Unfortunately it’s also been the only way you can watch what is by all other accounts, one of the greatest Sci-Fi movies ever made.
Welp, they’ve done it again… the movie will now be re-released in a ultra re-done and re-mastered DVD with the (oh dear God) new Definitive Director’s cut, the old Director’s cut and (thank you) the original theatrical version.
Whew.
Really the only reason why Hollywood does the Director’s cut thing is to squeeze out a few bucks anyway, seems now they’ve pushed the blood out of a turnip a little farther and are charging for what we wanted to see in the first place. It’s a growing trend- Lucas will re-release Episodes 4-6 in its original, fantastic version (if he could just take out all the crap from Episodes 1 and 2 I’d be able to sleep at night). It’s a slimy way to make a few extra bucks from someone who is mind-bogglingly rich anyway, and it pisses me off to no end that I have to jump through all his hoops, yet for whatever reason I’ll be the first in line to buy it.
Damn my geekieness, damn it all to heck!!

Paul Gleason, best know for his work as Richard (Dick) Vernon in “The Breakfast Club” (although I remember him in the made for TV special “Ewoks, The Battle For Endor”- nerd) passed away due to complication from mesothelioma.
And as we’ll all remember him from his John Hughes roles, I think my favorite line he delivered was from “Die Hard”- “Looks like we’re gonna need some more F.B.I. guys.”

R.I.P.

For whatever reason my sidebar was showing up on the bottom of my page- after posts, and rather than pouring through a bunch of HTML code that I’m clueless on I opted to instead just change the layout.
I’m not sure how I feel about the sidebar now being on the left, but when picking my template I had that in mind. Just kinda wanted a change ya know. Also, things seem kinda bigger- like it’s no longer my blog, but instead it’s my BLOG!
I also added a few more links on the side if you feel like indulging.
Oh, and if you had a link to your blog in the past but don’t have one now- well, update your page more than once every two months and you’ll be right back on my little cyber speed-dial.

Feedback on the new look is welcomed.

Update:
I know what it is that’s been bugging me about the new layout- the sidebar is way too wide. It’s damn near half the page.
Anyone out there with any HTML experience that could shoot me a quick fix (I can access the code from my template settings) would be advised that I’ll make it worth their while (wink, wink, nudge nudge).
Thanks all.....

Got a new printer, scanner, copier today. The printer part is a necessity, but the scanner part is just for fun.
For example, without the scanner, who of you would be able to see this handsome fellow?

The Dixie Chicks’ new album will be out soon and I for one am looking forward to it. I’ve like the Chicks for some time now- and no, not just because they’re kind of easy on the eyes, so is Jennifer Love Hewitt but I’m not going to buy her piece of crap album, I like them because they’re good.
Really good.
Being shunned by music row and traditional country stations probably isn’t much of a big deal for them as they really stepped themselves out via their music long before the controversy. The last album “Home” with its heavy bluegrass, dark overtones and ultra-layered musicianship really made it impossible to be marketable to the Kenny Chesney crowd. Yet, none the less it sold well, and I’ll be willing to bet “Taking the Long Way” will do the same.
Seems to me like it has been put together very well, from the Boston Globe-

(Rick) Rubin assembled a feisty band that includes Red Hot Chili Peppers drummer Chad Smith and Heartbreakers Benmont Tench and Mike Campbell, and the Chicks — whose records, for all the outspoken commentary, seem to err on the mild-mannered side — responded in kind. Collaborators such as former Semisonic frontman Dan Wilson, singer-songwriters Pete Yorn and Neil Finn, and Sheryl Crow help fill the disc with folk-rock hooks that place the Dixie Chicks circa 2006 closer to the Indigo Girls than the Judds.

Pete Yorn and Neil Finn huh? Interesting.

Finn’s distinguished fingerprints are all over ‘‘Silent House,’’ an elegant heartbreaker about Maines’s grandmother, who has Alzheimer’s disease. Likewise, Crow has had her wistful, winsome way with ‘‘Favorite Year.’’ And yet the Dixie Chicks — who share songwriting credits on every track — stamp each song with humble, clear-eyed harmonies, signature fiddle and banjo, and plain-spoken sentiments. It requires at least as much courage to deliver the emotionally naked lyrics to ‘‘Voice Inside My Head’’ as any loaded political barb; you can practically hear Maines steeling herself at the start of each verse and collecting herself at the finish. That transparency is only one of the ways the Dixie Chicks set themselves apart from, and above, their country music brethren.

I have to say, I’m very interested to see where they take this. I’ll keep ya posted.

Being a left of center moderate, I wonder if the confirmed left will give as much publicity to this as they did for Tom Delay and Rush Limbaugh’s recent jack-hole antics?

ALEXANDRIA, Va. - A congressman under investigation for bribery was caught on videotape accepting $100,000 in $100 bills from an FBI informant whose conversations with the lawmaker also were recorded, according to a court document released Sunday. Agents later found the cash hidden in his freezer.
At one audiotaped meeting, Rep. William Jefferson, D-La., chuckles about writing in code to keep secret what the government contends was his corrupt role in getting his children a cut of a communications company’s deal for work in Africa.

We’ll have to wait and see.

About two to four times a year, the weather takes some sort of weird turn (well actually not weird, they’re called “seasons” and it happens all the time) and it causes me some nasty sinus migraines.
Got one about 9:30 last night but went into work anyway- just to make sure everything got started off ok.
One good thing about the sunless cave of hopelessness that I call my bedroom is that with all the light blocked out it makes for a perfect recovery sanctuary for migraines. Oh, and I’m just kidding about the ‘cave of hopelessness’ thing- it’s really not that bad at all, and I’m doing quite well myself- it just sounded funny that way.
So there actually were a few issues at work that I had to address so I hung out ‘till about 3am, and then somehow managed to waddle my way back home. I slept for a good 6 hours or so and am now feeling a little better. I suspect by noon (ironically the time which I’d be getting out of work anyway, I’ll be back to near normal. By 3 or 4 I might even be able to squeeze in a ride.
What’s nice about my migraines (talk about finding a silver lining) is that when they’re done, they’re done. No hanging out for a few days, they just kinda disappear- usually within two hours of their descent, not to return for at least 4 months.
So today, I’m a veggie.
Oh, and if you get the reference to the post’s title, then you are truly a music phenom.

Although I’m currently an Onkyo owner (at 50% retail I really didn’t have a choice) don’t think for a second I’m not eyeing Harmon Kardon’s AVR 745, due out in July.
Oh man is this thing a beast.

Digital audio meets digital video. Ready for the future, the AVR 745’s DCDi® by Faroudja video processing flawlessly upscales all incoming video to 720p or 1080i high definition and outputs it through an HDMI™ jack. On the audio side, direct HDMI connection to compatible DVD-Audio players, USB playback from compatible digital audio sources and XM-Ready® capability for digital satellite radio greatly expand your digital options. Our advanced EzSet/EQ II system, 7.2-channel capability, TC 30 remote and more make this the most flexible AVR we’ve ever produced.

The DCDi isn’t anything new but I’ve seen it and it’s amazing. What did catch my eye is the DVD-A option that connects direct via HDMI. Opposed to the my current multi-channel direct currents which are through a series of 6 RCAs, I’m assuming HDMI (or High Definition Media Interface) has an increased bandwidth for more accurate and stronger signal ratios. But then again I might just be blowing smoke up all your asses with my nerdy A/V techno-babble. Really, my friend Matt over at Paradigm Shift could not only explain it a lot better than me, but he’ll actually be accurate.
Anyhoo, one of my perks at work is that I get some pretty good manufacture’s discounts so if y’all want to pitch in to buy this for me it will only set you back $1584.00 opposed to the msrp of $2999.00.
So let’s get to it people.

So just what is it that I do that requires me to start work at 11:30pm? Nope, I’m not manning the night shift at 7-11, but sometimes I feel like that may be less stress (he, he, snort).
I work in distribution for (as the attached article states) Circuit City. My gig as a supervisor is to ensure that the daily download (what’s going out in shipping that day) arrives and is implemented properly, and to oversee the selection of non-conveyable items- that is items such as TVs that cannot ride a conveyor belt. This and about a million other things in-between.
It’s a great job that keeps my mind at attention as well as a nice mix of administrative and labor- meaning when necessary I do sit in my office, but I’m also out and around and NOT getting bored in front of a computer. I also work with some great people (who incidentally have been really supportive during this craptacular time).
Anyway there was a write-up in a local paper on our facility that points out some staggering numbers concerning our operation (size of building, etc.) that are interesting even to me… and I work here.
If ya wanna check it out then click HERE.
…Just What I Needed.

I was just on IMDB reading some of the trivia for Monty Python’s “The Life of Brian” and came across this-

An early idea for a scene involved Jesus, a skilled carpenter frustrated by being crucified on a poorly built cross.

Now that’s funny stuff.

I was a little shocked today to hear about the retirement of NFL quarterback Doug Flutie. Shocked I guess because I thought he retired like five years ago. Turned out he lasted a staggering 21 years in pro ball. Granted a good deal of that was in the CFL, but the hits are just as hard.
21 years! That’s a long freakin’ time for any job, let alone football- and not even a punter, but a quarterback. There’s a good portion of guys selected in last month’s draft that weren’t even born when he threw his miracle pass against Miami. Babies born on the day he went pro are now drinking legally.

Flutie spent 12 seasons in the NFL and played in the U.S. Football League and the Canadian Football League. He won the CFL's Most Outstanding Player award six times and the league's Grey Cup championship three times.
His college career was also punctuated by a play that endures as one of the most memorable in the sport. He won the 1984 Heisman after connecting with Gerard Phelan on a desperation 48-yard touchdown pass that beat Miami as time expired.

All the while, he did it with class, dignity and professionalism. In a way he’s in that class of rare sports guys (the Cal Ripkins of the world) who just have it all.
We’ll be seeing him around in the near future as a college analyst for ABC and ESPN.

Oh sweet Jesus, Think Geek is now featuring the Dual-bladed Darth Maul Lightsaber for a mere $199.00
Joy.
Now this ain’t your Toys R Us, Halloween lightsaber that you remember as a kid- no, this is a seriously cool replica that you want as an adult.

-Glowing blades ignites with realistic power-up/down effects!
-Authentic sound effects digitally recorded from the movie.
-Features four motion sensor controlled sound effects, Power-up, idle hum, clash, and power-down
-Durable metal hilt looks and feels like a real lightsaber.
-Sturdy blade is permanently attached to the hilt
-Comes with a custom-designed display stand when you need a break from dueling.

The blade is fabricated from poly-carbon (not carbonite) and is strong enough to hit things lightly, but not necessarily strong enough for fighting. This is good because otherwise my nerdlings and I would fight all day and never leave the confines of our nerd-lair.
Actually, I work with a guy who’s seen these and he said the realism (minus of course the ability to slice through metal and flesh and repel lasers) is really stunning. Everyone who sees one, wants one.

I’ve been told by several people that whenever the crap papers are signed I should go out and treat myself to something nice- I suppose they were thinking of some new clothes, some stuff for my bike, whatever. However, I might just be going in a different direction. If there was one thing I would have never been allowed to buy while I was married (other than maybe a crack whore)- this is it.

I’m not sure why, but when I turn my external computer speakers all the way down, I pick up the local country station.

Um, I wasn’t aware they had a tuner in them…

Oh.. my… God.
I’ve been told from time to time that I’m a pretty creative guy, yet even I can’t make this shit up. I suppose I’ll just quote-

LONDON (Reuters) - Julie Andrews wannabes lined up on Friday to audition for a reality TV show with a new twist -- the winner gets the lead role in a new Andrew Lloyd Webber stage production of "The Sound of Music."
A BBC spokeswoman for the "How Do I Solve A Problem Like Maria?" show said more than 1,000 hopefuls had applied for the London weekend of auditions at the Wembley conference center.
They will be gradually whittled down to 10 finalists with television viewers voting for who should star in the London West End production due to open at the end of the year.

I remember when I was a kid and every time “The Sound Of Music” came on my Mom would MAKE me watch it. She says it was to give me a little culture, but instead I think she may have had some Freudian longing for me to be a raging homo (all apologies for that term, especially to those readers of mine who actually are raging homos). As I grew older, and got to the point where I could appreciate things formally forced upon me for myself, well I still didn’t like it. I think it’s my weird dislike for Julie Andrews… she’s just so androgenisticly perfect, and she knows it. Trust me, “Victor Victoia” was total type-casting.
Either way, if you like “The Sound Of Music” or not, this still seems like some sort of sacrilege.

The new "Superman Returns" trailer is out… and of course I’m on pins and needles waiting to see this thing.
Check it out HERE. (Quicktime required)

So, Brittney Spears is preggo again.
Sigh….
How much you wanna bet Justin Timberlake is sitting at home, staring a naked Cameron Diaz in his bed thinking “whew, dodged that bullet”?
Does anyone else remember when we gave a crap about this person? Do her ‘people’ realize that she’s now lost her core audience? I’m not talking about the pre-puber, Bratz club. I’m talking about the 25-37 year old men. Or, better yet- dudes like me.
You see Britt, when you first came on the scene we oogled you not because of your talent (really, were you even kidding yourself with that one?) but because of these simple reasons- you were just slightly underage, but not so much that you made us feel creepy, you had a killer body, and you pranced around in a slightly naughty school-girl outfit, complete with tartan skirt and knee highs. For that I still thank you.
But let’s look at life since then.
You’ve aged. Not your fault but that ‘might not be innocent’ thing left with it. Plus, your boobies are starting to sag (from what I hear at least).
You’ve lost your hotness. Yup, it’s safe to say that Jessica Simpson passed you quite a while ago on that one (however if she’s passed you on the ‘I’m a fucking moron’ scale remains to be seen.)
The lack of talent thing caught up to you. Let’s face it, love her or hate her- Christina Aguilera can freakin’ whale. And for some reason she was always my favorite anyway… She too got married, but no one cares because her guy has the brainpower to spell the word ‘receipt’.
You’re damaged goods. You’ve been knocked up, twice now, by a complete grease ball. Really, he’s of those people that seem to be famous for no real reason at all- like Charo.
You’re just too stupid. Really, even if you got your hotness back and dumped K-Yoko it would only last for so long. There’s only a so much a man can take before he decides that all he really wants is Hillary Duff.
So here’s what you do. Squeeze out that pup, dump the dead weight (and by that I mean both figuratively and literally) move him out to a guest house on a set allowance- invest- er, get someone to invest for you wisely, play the Madonna thing and find / produce some new talent, then just slip out of the public eye.
Seriously, you’re on a fast track to a “Smoking Gun” frontpage.

Lost our last 6 games.
6 Games!!!
You figure I'd either be used to this or so imbittered it just rolls off me.
Oy.

I did the big move this weekend. Had two friends come over with trucks and a trailer and got my big stuff packed up and hauled away in one big load. This include my dining room set (a gift from Mom) the entertainment center, two bookshelves and some other various things. In essence it was all the stuff that takes more than one person to lift.
It was pretty painless; less a few moments of emotion, all and all it went pretty smooth and the ending involved a Walt’s Double Decker pizza and several pitchers of beer (I’ve been sure to avoid alcohol for a while but figured why not). My therapist (or as The Saturday Night Live, Sean Connery Celebrity Jeopardy character likes to say- The Rapist) told me that when he got his divorce (yep, a therapist on his second marriage, kinda seems like a dentist with a few to many false teeth, but I suppose he wasn’t always a therapist) the moving out it was the toughest thing he did. It took him days to do what should have been just a few hours as he couldn’t get himself together. But for whatever reason, maybe because I had friends to help, it went pretty smoothly and I kept it together pretty well.
Got up the next day and moved all my clothes and toiletries into the new (temporary) digs (actually, not really new- it’s my Mom’s pad) so I could be prepared to start spending the night. Now that my stuff’s there, I’ve basically created a big mess at my Mom’s. The two most important things to take care of were getting the clothing situation under control and organized (no problem there) and sealing up the windows with aluminum foil.
Huh?
Yup, aluminum foil. I work third shift which means I go to bed sometime before 5pm, the sunlight pretty much allows any chance of a restful sleep, so I gotta shut out mother sun. So, in summation I’m a 35 year old man currently living in a nice, yet small, dark room in my mother’s house- or as I like to call it the worst psychological environment possible for my current situation. But hey, its free.
I figure I’ll stay at Mom’s for a few months and get my wits about me, while saving a boatload of money for a nice down payment on a my own home.
So, all in all I’m not doing too bad, considering. There are bouts of sadness, fear and loneliness, but I’m hopeful that will soon be replaced with freedom and wonderment to the future journey.
Either way, it’s gonna end with a really nice couple bottles of wine.

Well as most of you have surmised there’s something rather negative going on in my life, and about two days ago things were set in place to make the process all official-like. Therefore I can go ahead and let the cat out of the bag (even though most, if not all of you have figured it out already).
I suppose I’ll stick to the normal “Radio Free” modus operandi thusly-

“Kirk and Jennifer sittin’ in a tree
Getting’ a d-i-v-o-r-c-e….
First came ‘love’
Then came marriage
Then came personality types of perfectionism, co-dependency, flight not fight, and a staggering unwillingness to compromise."

Yup, you read right. Me and Jennifer are splitzville (trust me, had I written this thing a week and a half ago it would have a much different tone). After just 1 ½ years (an embarrassing number) she decided that maybe marriage wasn’t what she thought it would be so she thought it best for us to go our separate ways. Personally, I’d like us to do all that we can (couples counseling, etc.) to salvage what was (for the most part) a pretty good thing- but one person can only do so much. Luckily we’ve got less than two years invested, and with no kids- if it was gonna happen, now’s the time.
I will say this- after this whole shitty and unfortunate mess is over with I will be able to sleep at night knowing that I did everything I possibly could to save what we had. After all, fighting for what you believe and love is what defines someone as a man. There are few feelings in this world worse than regret, and I am confident that is a feeling I will not possess.
I’m doing a few things that to protect myself. First off, we were originally going to decide who gets what and have a lawyer friend of mine draw up the paperwork to save a few bucks, but cooler heads with no emotional ties convinced me otherwise. Ergo, I got my own guy to do the negotiating for me. His best interests are my best interests and he will not be clouded by emotion (how many guys do you know have said, “ah, just give her whatever she wants” only to regret it within a year).
We’ll be selling the house soon, so anyone interested in a beautiful, five year old home with 1.3 acres and in a great neighborhood, let me know.
I’m in the process of moving out and should be pretty much completely gone by this time next week. I’ll then stay at Mom’s for a few months, maybe longer so I can scrap and save about 15-20 grand to get my life going again. Besides, as cooky as it will seem (being a 35 year old man, living at his mother’s) I think the positive security and lack of living alone will do me some good.
I’m also seeing a therapist. A few weeks ago this seemed like a necessity as I was really nothing more than an empty shell of something that used to be a man, but I’ve accepted the reality of what’s happening (although it still feels very unreal) and am bouncing back quite well. Granted, I still have my moments, but the playing field seems to be leveling off. I’m sure that this will all get worse before it gets better, and when it does the therapy should supply me with the tools to handle it. Besides, I want to make sure that I come out of this ok. Anyone who knows me is very aware of my positive nature and sense of humor, that is one of the things that defines me and I refuse to let a situation that is not of my creation take that from me.
The strange thing is that I feel really guilty about all my friends and family who were at our wedding not more than two years ago- it’s like I wasted their time or something. I’m sure they don’t mind and are filled more with feelings of concern rather than disappointment, but none the less the feeling is there.
I suppose I could go on and on, but what more is there to say? This is a situation of neither my control nor of my decision, therefore from this point forward it’s really all about me. That, more than most others, is a feeling that I will have some difficulty adjusting to. When you have spent the last few years of your life consumed with the direction of putting yourself last, well it’s hard to do the emotional 180.
‘Radio Free’ has always been a self-bitching free zone, so don’t expect to hear to much more of this. Many authors of my regular blog rounds continue to weave the soap opera of their lives, and I love them for it, but that’s just not my personal style. ‘Radio Free’ is an escape, and my readers are the conductors.
So don’t go cryin’ for me Argentina, I’ll pull through this somehow and some way. Until then…. well I’ll just keep writing.