Radio Free Kirkopolis

Does ya like “Star Wars?”
Does ya like comedy?
Well then check out THIS.
It’s probably the funniest Fan Movie I’ve ever freakin’ seen.

UPDATE: The above link no longer works...
Try it HERE.
(You know, it's pretty bad when Lucas doesn't care about copyright infringment, but Turner Broadcasting does... but then again they're the same people that brought you CNN.

Oh- and Gene, you may be right- "Hardware Wars" might just be the funniest, but this is pretty darned good.

Rudy Gay has just been chosen as the 3rd overall pick in the 2006 NBA draft. How much you wanna bet his jersey won’t exactly sell like hotcakes.
Let’s hope that he’s not on the same team as Romania’s Vladimir Imasissyboy (o.k., I just made that last part up).

I’m not sure why, but all my bank’s ATMs have British accents.
I’m not sure why, but for some reason I find that unsettling.

Just a little old school REM for y’all.
So I gots me a little mini-vacation going on. Mini ‘cause it’s only two days off, but if falls after a Wednesday off and the weekend so it’s really like being gone for five days.
Anyhoo I started out by getting up way to early, then finding out that my e-mail, which was to be up by now was still out. So I muttered around and tried to make a breakfast, only to find I desperately needed to go to the grocery store.
Stopped by Wal-Mart to return a defective fishing reel (my dad and I have started fishing, but more on that during another post) and to pick up a new one. I found however that if you go to Wal-Mart just after 9am you miss the crowd with jobs, and you’re too early to hit the customers who don’t have jobs- I suppose they're still sleeping in, watching 'The View', whatever. To make my point there was only one person ahead of my at customer service. Nice.
Then took off for some groceries. Now, it’s a well known fact that I must make out a list before I buy groceries lest I spend about $700 more than I originally intended. The list helps me keep that under control. The only items I picked up that weren’t on the list were some white seedless grapes and a tube of chocolate chip cookie dough. Ummm, Toll House.
Got home and tried to figure out my e-mail problem, then finally someone at Verizon had the balls to tell me that not only could they not fix my problem, but when I move it will happen again. So, if anyone has tried to send me something in the last few days please resend (drop me a comment and I’ll forward the new address).
Then I did something I haven’t done I a loooong time. I went to the movies. I guess today is the opening day for “Superman Returns” which I didn’t know, but I figured it’s a 12:30 in the afternoon showing so how bad could it be? Well, it wasn’t. I was one of about 10 people and they weren’t as annoying as the night crowds (I demand complete and utter silence in my movie going experiences). I got me some popcorn (not buttered of course) and took in the whole cinematic experience.
To say the least- this movie ROCKED!!! That Bryan Singer is a really good film-maker. The special effects are really outstanding but in addition to the big visual experiences they made, they also allowed for some subtletees that make the movie as a whole more realistic. You’ll notice that Superman’s flying scenes just seem more natural, something I’m sure they couldn’t have done in the originals. Also, there’s about six or seven shots that (as stills) just take your breath away.
The acting and casting is great- Kate Bosworth whom I’ve never really seen before is my new girl friend, Parker Posey I have seen before and is still my girl friend, Brandon Routh is a tall drink of water that makes us mortals feel like chumps (but was a really good casting choice) and Kevin Spacey is, well he’s Kevin damn Spacey… so yeah, he’s awesome.
Script and story were good, with a nice little surprise that I’m shocked was kept under wraps for so long.
In a nutshell, do yourself a favor and go see it. It’s one of those big blockbuster types (done well) that just looks better on the big screen.
After that I went home and baked cookies. I then dipped them (while still oven hot) in a big glass of milk.
Yup, I’m gonna have some good time off.

From FoxSports.

Researchers reported on the eve of the 2006 Tour de France, which gets under way in Strasbourg on July 1, that cyclists may be able to increase their athletic performance by taking Viagra, a drug most commonly used to treat male impotence.
Certain cyclists have more trouble than others in sustaining high levels of exertion at mountainous elevations, but the study, to be published in the Journal of Applied Physiology, found that Viagra could boost a rider's athletic performance by 45 per cent.
The cyclists were tested on an exercise bike both under normal conditions and while breathing air low in oxygen. Some were given Viagra while others were given a sugar pill placebo.
"The participants told us that while they were riding the bike they didn't know whether they were on the drug or not," Dr Friedlander said.
"However, what they did say was that in the showers afterwards they pretty much knew which pill they had been given." Viagra was originally launched as a medication for pulmonary hypertension, which occurs when blood vessels in the lungs constrict, decreasing the amoViagra counteracts these effects because it dilates blood vessels, thus relieving constrictions in the vessels and allowing blood to flow more freely through some organs in the body.
Viagra is not listed as a banned drug by the World Anti-Doping Agency, but Sean Petty, chief of staff for USA Cycling, the organisation that oversees competitive bike racing in the US, said "if it's determined at some point to be a performance-enhancing drug, I'm sure it will be on the banned list".
Dr Friedlander, however, has a hunch that some athletes are already taking Viagra for competition, possibly including cyclists competiting in Le Tour next month.
"Cyclists are always looking for that competitive edge," she said.
"They are scanning for anything, and it's conceivable that they might be taking it already."

This should be very interesting news to the World Anti-Doping Agency who’s president is named- and I’m not kidding here- Dick Pound.
Classic.

Miss me? It’s been a crazy last few days so I haven’t written nothin’, but amazingly enough I have little to nothing to say.
I did go to St. Louis for a seminar, but it was utterly un-eventful. A great seminar, but unless you work in distribution you would probably care less. Well, except that I was at this bar/grill place pn the Hill and was really jonesing for cigarette so I bought a pack for somewhat over 4 bucks and only smoked 3 in like two hours, then intentionally left the pack there. I’m not sure why I really wanted a smokie treat, but it’s been forever and for some reason they really hit the spot.
Other than that absolutely nothing has been going on, I’ve just been busy.
Well, I’m gonna finish off that Waltz thin crust I ordered, listen to a little Jane’s Addiction and divulge in some strawberry ice cream. Action packed huh?
This Sunday I’m fishing with dad in the new boat- I haven’t been fishing in like 10 years so I’ll give ya report on the frustrations of it all.
Now, you just wasted about three minutes of you life reading this post. SUCKERS!!!

... and her name is Edy's Slow Churn.
Man, you gotta try this stuff.

Stealing a page from Gene I took the OK Cupid! Politics Test and it confirmed I one thing about me- I am utterly boring.
Below are my staggeringly droll results, take it for yourself, it’s kind’a fun.

You are a Social Moderate (41% permissive) and an... Economic Moderate (43% permissive) You are best described as a: Centrist Link: The Politics Test on Ok Cupid Also: The OkCupid Dating Persona Test

"I will tell you what I will do and what I will not do. I will not serve that in which I no longer believe whether it call itself my home, my fatherland or my church: and I will try to express myself in some mode of life or art as freely as I can and as wholly as I can, using for my defense the only arms I allow myself to use--silence, exile, and cunning."

There are some musicians in Rock and Roll who have played somewhat small, yet vitally important rolls in its history.
Billy Preston was one such man.
I have this DVD of “A Concert For George” in which a whole bunch of great people play tribute to (my favorite Beatle) George Harrison. Along with Paul, Ringo, Eric Clapton and Tom Petty, Billy was there- and his set was breathtaking. Incidentally if you dig The Beatles you should really invest in this DVD. Along with the music, the sound quality is superb.
I really liked Billy Preston and am quite saddened to hear of his passing. Instead of running the risk of writing something that can’t even begin to do him justice, I’ll leave his story to Rolling Stone. Do yourself a favor and read the whole thing, you’ll be glad that you did. He’s one of those people we all should know more about, and become better people when we do.

Billy Preston, the gifted keyboardist who recorded with both the Beatles and the Rolling Stones and scored two of his own Number One hits, died of kidney failure in Scottsdale, Arizona, Tuesday at fifty-nine.
Preston, sometimes referred to as "the fifth Beatle," was the only performer to receive a recording credit with the group, when the single "Get Back" was attributed to the Beatles with Billy Preston. He scored his own chart-toppers with "Will It Go Round in Circles" (1973) and "Nothing From Nothing" (1974), and he was co-wrote "You Are So Beautiful," which became a Top Five hit for Joe Cocker in 1975. By then, Preston's reputation was strong enough to earn him the distinction of becoming the first-ever musical guest on Saturday Night Live. He also played the role of Sgt. Pepper in the 1978 film version of the Beatles' seminal concept album Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band, and his career included sessions with such greats as Little Richard, Ray Charles, Bob Dylan, Sly and the Family Stone, and the Red Hot Chili Peppers.
Born in Houston on September 9th, 1946, Preston moved with his family to Los Angeles early on. A child prodigy, he played with Mahalia Jackson by age ten and appeared as the young W.C. Handy in the 1958 film St. Louis Blues. Touring Europe with Little Richard's band in 1962, he first met the Beatles. After signing with Sam Cooke's SAR label, he moved onto Vee-Jay, where he released two well-received instrumental gospel albums, The Most Exciting Organ Ever and The Wildest Organ in Town!.
Working in the studio band on the ABC TV series Shindig, Preston was recruited by Ray Charles. George Harrison spotted him performing with Charles on a BBC special and invited him to record with the Beatles. In addition to "Get Back," the keyboardist took part in the sessions that would become the Let It Be album. Harrison encouraged the signing of Preston to the Beatles' Apple label, where he released two albums, That's the Way God Planned It and Encouraging Words. He also appeared on Harrison's first solo album, All Things Must Pass, and on the historic recording of the Concert for Bangladesh. Preston's connection to the Beatles would continue for years; he worked on John Lennon's Plastic Ono Band album and, in 1989, joined Ringo Starr's first All Starr Band tour.
Preston was a collaborator in demand beyond the Fab Four. He appeared on a string of Rolling Stones albums -- including Sticky Fingers, Exile on Main Street and Black and Blue -- touring for a time as the band's featured guest.
In his own solo career he enjoyed several years of remarkable success in the mid-1970s, beginning with the Grammy-winning hit "Outa-Space" in 1972 and ending in 1980 with "With You I'm Born Again," a Top Five duet with Syreeta Wright, one-time wife of Stevie Wonder. In later years, Preston made studio appearances with singers including Luther Vandross, Elton John, Gladys Knight and Enrique Iglesias.
The 1990s were difficult times, as the singer, who admitted a decades-long dependency on drugs and alcohol, was in recurring trouble with the law over charges including an insurance fraud scam that involved a fire at his house. Though he spent much of the decade in prison or on probation, he continued to perform whenever possible. Just before his death, he appeared on albums by Neil Diamond (12 Songs) and the Red Hot Chili Peppers (Stadium Arcadium). A virtuoso, Preston was also extremely versatile, spanning gospel, funk, classic rock and many other styles. Prefiguring a 1973 album that he called Everybody Likes Some Kind of Music, he described his ideal audience in a 1971 Rolling Stone interview: "Young whites, young blacks, old people, jazz people -- I want 'em all."
JAMES SULLIVAN

As anyone who even thought about listening to an Iron Maiden song can tell you, today is 6-6-6.
Cool huh?
I’ve found myself writing checks all day just so I can write it down some more.
So, with the today being the pinnacle of evil stuff, one must ask- who is the most evil from this list of the very evil?
Is it-

Pol Pot

Ozzy Osbourne

Charles Manson

Star Jones

You Decide.

So St. Louis- how was your weekend?
Not so good you say?
Humm, welcome to the world of a Cubs fan.
Seems you lost two out of three to my near bottom-dwelling boys, and then lost the best player on your team, er- scratch that, the best player on any team for quite some time. Well, with Pujols out and Edmunds at about 60% (even less when you figure he’s off the juice) have fun placing all your hopes on Scott Rollen.
Ha, Ha! F**ckers!
If you have trouble coping, gim’me a call. The answer lies in a cold bottle of Old Style.

As you may have read I was seeing a therapist. I say that in the past tense since I haven’t been in a few weeks. Frankly, I don’t really think it’s necessary at this time. I’m doing surprisingly well and we therefore don’t have much to discuss. I’ll reschedule however once the actual divorce papers are signed since I’m sure new things’ll pop up.
That’s self improvement #1.
Now that my noggin has gotten some attention I noticed that I’m also focusing in on the body. I’m riding a freaking ton, averaging 30-35 miles per ride (over 100 miles per week). My diet has changed for the better, lots of good stuff to eat and without being one of those freaks that sacrifices pleasure in eating because I’m concentrating on total carb. intakes and how many branch chain amino acids are in that bag of Frito’s. I’ll stick with the chicken breasts and vitamin regiment, without being afraid of that pizza and beer on a Saturday.
It seems to be paying off. I’ve never really been chunky, but the last few years I’ve developed a bit of a gut. Well the gut is dwindling down and I’m getting some pretty good muscle tone (going to Gold’s Gym now too). As a matter of fact a friend (yup, a lady) from work noted to me this un-solicited and rather head expanding quote-
“You know Kirk, you’ve always been a cutie, but lately you’ve become a hottie.”
Now she may just have been trying to buck up my self esteem, but I’ll trick myself into thinking that it was sincere.
Either way, I feel like a million bucks and am quite certain I’ll stick with it for the long haul.
Note: I was going to insert a picture of Antonio Sabato Jr. and make some sort of silly quirk about how similar the two of us look (which of course isn’t true, thus the humor) but I couldn’t seem to find a picture of him without some sort of heavy, homoerotic overtone. So just use your imagination and laugh hysterically at my composed wit.

Now for the minimalist changes in Kirk’s Vida Loco-
There’s this girl I know… she’s a good friend, smart, very cool and has a great insight in to life matters (as well as being quite easy on the eyes, but that’s a whole ‘nother story that choose not to embrace… for now) so when she speaks, I listen.
Anyway, we were having drinks and pleasant conversation (if I recall I was partaking in Dr. Stoly tonic, me faves), I went to pay and thus whipped out my wallet. It was then she happened to note that I should consider ditching the wallet and getting a clip.
I was intrigued.
“Really, a clip you say?”
Turns out that the clip v. wallet issue is one that she and her girlfriends actually discuss. They seem to liken the wallet to something their dads use, not guys they may or may not be interested in.
Could it be that I stumbled onto one of those little, yet important qualities that ‘the ladies’ look for, yet only keep to themselves? Is it the female equivalent to the greatness a girl shows when, after you unlock, and open the car door for her, she leans over to unlock your door for you (which b.t.w. is a sure-fire way to a man’s heart)?
Hummm, I wondered.
I gave it some thought, however admittedly not much. Like I said, when someone like this talks, I listen. However I knew it was going to be tough. After all, I like my wallet. When it’s in that back, left pocket it will act as some sort of security blanket. When it’s not there I get these weird insecurity things going on.
On the other hand, I’m trying to minimalize, streamline if you will, my life. It’s an easier and more efficient way to be.
So I decided to take the plunge. First up was ditching a bunch of un-needed stuff from Mr. Wallet. That was a good trick; after all do I really need my prescription card on me at all times? See, I’m streamlining baby, streamlining.
Quick list of things I ditched, kept neatly in my desk drawer-

Kroger Plus card (I have one on my keychain)
Home Depot gift card with unknown balance
Two year old emergency phone list from work
Out-dated appointment card from my therapist
Illinois Department of Public Health Food Safety certification
Passport card (really, they give you these)
Illinois Firearm Owner’s Identification
Sam’s Club membership (under the ex’s work, yup I’m keeping it and using it. Suckers)
Southern Illinois University identification (graduated 8 years ago)
Dental Insurance card
Another appointment card for my therapist

So I downsized, leaving only two credit cards, ATM / Debit card, medical insurance card, drivers license and insurance card. Went from 17 to 6. Not bad.

So I’m sure it will take a little getting used to, but this way my pants will stop leaning to the left. But I wonder, is this clip over wallet thing really something that comes up?
Perhaps I’ll do some sort of case study.
Ladies, your feedback is requested and welcomed.