Radio Free Kirkopolis

A certain measure of innocence
Willing to appear naive
A certain degree of imagination
A measure of make-believe
A certain degree of surrender
To the forces of light and heat
A shot of satisfaction
In a willingness to risk defeat
Celebrate the moment
As it turns into one more
Another chance at victory
Another chance to score
The measure of the moment
In a difference of degree
Just one little victory
A spirit breaking free
One little victory
The greatest act can be
One little victory
A certain measure of righteousness
A certain amount of force
A certain degree of determination
Daring on a different course
A certain amount of resistance
To the forces of the light and love
A certain measure of tolerance
A willingness to rise above

-Neil Peart
"One Little Victory"

Was anyone else aware that they’re just inches (he he) from completing a birth control pill for guys?

The effects of the male equivalent of the Pill should be easily reversible, a study shows.
The contraceptive will never be widely used unless men can be sure that once they stop taking it their sperm counts will return to normal. To test that this is true of the combinations of implants and pills used so far in trials, a team led by Peter Liu, of the Los Angeles Biomedical Research Institute, examined 30 studies on the male Pill published between 1990 and 2005.

Now, given my present, marital state (more on that in a few days) I’m trying to figure out if this is magically just in time, or ironically to a day late.
I'll be chewing on this one for a while.

So some British guy thought it would be a great idea to make it easier for people to ironically not embrace their new digs while trying to embrace their new digs. I’m referring to a new, Spanish version of the “Star Spangled Banner.”

British music producer Adam Kidron says that when he came up with the idea of a Spanish-language version of the U.S. national anthem, he saw it as an ode to the millions of immigrants seeking a better life.
But in the week since Kidron announced the song — which features artists such as Wyclef Jean, hip-hop star Pitbull and Puerto Rican singers Carlos Ponce and Olga Tanon — it has been the target of a fierce backlash.
Some Internet bloggers and others are infuriated by the thought of "The Star-Spangled Banner" sung in a language other than English.
"Would the French accept people singing the La Marseillaise in English as a sign of French patriotism? Of course not," said Mark Krikorian, head of the Washington-based Center for Immigration Studies, a think tank that supports tighter immigration controls.

You see, as I’m not Apache or Pawnee, my family tree is chuck full o’ immigrants. As recently as one generation to be exact. And you know what my family did- they bothered to adapt.
Now I’m not all anti-immigration, as a matter of fact I welcome new ideas to broaden our collective mindset, but if you leave a country then you leave a country. I don’t think one should forget about their heritage, but they should at least embrace their new culture as well. You should want to anyway, after all if America and its contents weren’t so appealing then why did you come here in the first place? Starting with the damn language. Really, isn’t it the least you could do? If I go to Europe I’ll do what I can to learn some conversational and otherwise important words and phrases and not expect them to just know English, in that same mindset, new Americans should do the same. There are immigrants that have lived here for 20 years that still don’t speak a word of English, so why (as in the case of this song) are we just making it easier for them not too? I suppose it’s nothing more than linguistical welfare.

It is as if God has left us, alone in a sea of despair and hopelessness-
Rosie O’Donnell has joined the cast of “The View.”

“The View" creator Barbara Walters confirmed Friday that O'Donnell will join her show in September, replacing the "Today" show-bound Meredith Vieira. Walters made the announcement from the stage of the Daytime Emmy awards.

So let me get this straight, Barbra Walters, Star Jones and Rosie O’Donnell in the same room at the same time- and we have to watch. Good Lord, why don’t they just throw in Yoko Ono to make it truly horrific for all of mankind?
There are few things in this world that I hate more than “The View” and those things just happen to be Rosie O’Donnell, Star Jones and Barbra Walters. Now that they are all together it would be like that guy from “Creed” releasing some music with… oh, it would just be like that guy from “Creed” releasing some music.
The strange thing about Rosie is that at one time I actually liked both her, her show and especially her stand-up. It’s not the lezzie thing I got a problem with (its 2006, deal with it people) it’s the whole “gotta save the world through my TV show that allows me to rake in millions of dollars for myself” thing that I got a problem with.
If you can recall, a few years ago there was a show kinda like this, only for guys. It was so bad that it was just sooo enjoyable to watch. It was called “The Other Half” and it starred Dick Clark, Danny Bonaduchi, A.C. Slater (of ‘Saved by the Bell’ fame, real name Mario Lopez but let's face it, he's Slater) and some random, non-threatening black guy. “The View” on the other hand really tries to be a show with some sort of social standing, when in fact it’s nothing but pure horror. Listening to the opinionated morality of these people is like taking cooking lessons from a meth dealer.
All in all, my day’s pretty much ruined. I’ll go back to this vile combination of evils in my head and fear for my future, your future and the future of our children.
Stay strong y’all, stay strong.

Pop songstress Shakira won six awards and reggaeton pacesetter Daddy Yankee took home three at the Billboard Latin Music Awards on Thursday night.
Later, Shakira, wearing a sparkling blue bikini top and red-and-white skirt, unleashed her trademark hip-wiggle as she danced and sang alongside Wyclef Jean on their pulsing collaboration "Hips Don't Lie."
The performance kept with the theme of these awards over the years: mix Latin acts with performances with crossover appeal.
Shakira also won the Spirit of Hope Award, in honor of the 29-year-old's work to improve living conditions for Colombian children through her charitable organization, Fundacion Piez Descalzos (Bare Feet Foundation). Four children from her foundation surprised her on stage and gave her the award.

You see- beauty, talent and a heart…. Oh muy nina, my infatuation just becomes more and more founded. Now if you could just be patient I have the strange urge to buy another copy of “The Catcher in the Rye.”

For the past few weeks, as I go through my many emotions and despite the trauma, I have to fight the feeling that I’m a big pussy for crying so much.
Today, for whatever reason, the good people of WalMart sent me a free sample of Poise Maxi Pads.
This doesn’t help me out much.
I expect the Summer Eve powder sometime next Tuesday.

Holy cow, a post… well you know ‘the muse’ and all.
In addition to keeping me in shape, my riding has been really therapeutic during my whole “thing” so needless to say, I’m doing a lot of it.
I’ve since hooked up with this guy that I knew from a few years ago that has been riding pretty much since the dawn of time. He’s a really nice guy, strong Christian and one of those all around good listeners. He’s a very positive individual. Within the past few years, most of the people I know in my little ‘berg have moved away, so it’s nice to have a friend that’s close by.
Anyway he rides with a few other guys on Tuesdays and he invited me to tag along. “Great” I says to him, “I’ve been looking forward to a group ride.” Group rides are a great way to improve, not only do other people give you tips along the way, but if you get tired you can always ride behind and use the draft. Most importantly however is the fact that you always push yourself to keep up with the fastest guy in the pack.
So I meet up with these guys and I’m feelin’ like a million bucks. I got a good night sleep, ate lots of carbs, and knew they’d look out for. Now I knew I’d struggle to keep up with these guys, but I was pretty confident I wouldn’t do too bad- after all, I’ve got the commitment (even shaved those legs), and have been averaging 25-30 miles per ride over some rough hills and at a pretty good pace, all without the aid of a draft. So, how bad could it be?
SWEET MOTHER OF HONEY BADGERS!!! These guys destroyed me. I was the youngest one at 35. My old buddy (Rob is his name) is about 39 and the other two guys are in their mid 40’s. After the first 8 miles I thought I was going to die. After the first 10 miles I was sure of it. They knew I was capable of about 25 but they were looking to do about 45-50, so at mile 12 or so I split off and headed back. I wound up doing just at 25 miles, which is nothing unusual for me, but not at that breakneck of a pace.
Have you ever gone out swimming for the first time all summer, and wound up swimming all day? You know the feeling the next day that you’re so sore that even your hair hurts? Yup, that was me.
I got totally killed by these fellas, each one, strong as a bull. Best of all, they are really supportive and generally nice guys.
You better believe that I’m going to be there each week, each ride pushing myself a little further and a little harder. I’ll work my way through the pain, realizing that it’s only a means to an end. I’ll know that some day, my commitment, dedication, and fire will get me back in the race. The easy part of the hill is always just over the top.

Well, just for a little while. I’d say about three weeks or so, off and on. I’ll do my best, when I have a good day that is, and the muse hits me, to post up a little quirky quip for y’all per my M.O.
Its like this- I’ll probably dish out the specifics later, but I’m going through a tough time right now. Really, it’s the toughest, saddest, most hurtful and painful time that I will probably ever go through in my life. Don't worry hoever, I’ll pull through.
But I need something from you, my readers.
You see, I really love having my blog, and it really makes my day to know that people actually read it. When I get a comment on something I get all excited. Kinda like when I was a kid and I got a real letter in the mail.
What I need from you all (that is if I may be so bold to ask) is to hang with the blog for a while. Check in from time to time. From all my regulars, most of whom I’ve know for so long, to my new ‘imaginary friends’ – the all girl R&B trio of Jawamily, Eileen, Steigfried, and to all those in between. I so very do hope you’ll stick around. You people mean more than you’ll know.

From the point of conception
To the moment of truth
At the point of surrender
To the burden of proof
From the point of ignition
To the final drive
The point of the journey is not to arrive
Anything can happen...

First off, sorry ‘bout so long in between posts but, well I’ll touch on that later…. maybe.
Anyhoo I was checking out “Hogan Knows Best” today and as much as I love the show, I really can’t take how damn staged it is.
In this particular installment the Hogan family (and that’s Hulk Hogan’s family, not Valerie Harper / Sandy Duncan’s family) went to Key West for vacation. On one particularly boring day the brother and the sister went out and around without the parents, but with strict instructions from the Hulkster to stay together. Well of course they didn’t and the daughter winds up coming back to the hotel like six hours late. The whole time the Hogan’s are freaking out, calling the police, crying, all sorts of rigmarole. We the audiences however, know she’s ok and just shopping; we even get to see what she’s buying.
Then it dawns on me.
She has a camera crew following her.
Um, does Hulk think that the camera crew is going to sit there and tape something really, really bad happening to her? Why is Hulk calling the police to find her and not the camera crew?
So now Hulk has totally ruined my belief that reality TV is real. The next thing you know he’ll do the same with professional wrestling.

A few days ago Jason posted about how damned fat we’re getting. To the point where our nation’s hospital beds can’t support us anymore and we gotta trade up.
Now its spreading to our children. Not our kids mind you, but our damn babies and toddlers.

More than a quarter of a million U.S. children ages 1 to 6 are heavier than the weight limits for standard car seats, and most are 3-year-olds who weigh more than 40 pounds, the study found.
Unless exceptionally tall, a 3-year-old weighing more than 40 pounds would generally be considered overweight.
Lead author Lara Trifiletti said researchers at a safety center at Johns Hopkins Hospital became interested in the topic because they saw children "who were very obese and our car-seat technicians were having a hard time finding car seats to fit them."

What I don’t get is that these parents are concerned enough for their child’s “safety” that they’d put them in a protective child seat, but either don’t realize or give a rat’s ass that the real danger is how Lil’ Precious McBlubber is dangerously overweight.
Just give him another Twinkie, he’ll stop crying.

Man, this is just ballsy.
Two guys actually thought it was a good idea to smuggle in a whole lot’a blow in, get this, statues of the Virgin Mary.

NEW YORK (Reuters) - Two men suspected of helping smuggle cocaine to New York from Mexico inside statues of the Virgin Mary were arrested Thursday, U.S. authorities said…
Five 3-foot-tall statues of the Virgin Mary, filled with 242 pounds of cocaine, were seized in a Brooklyn warehouse as part of the police operation.

Seriously, when these guys die and God gets to that part of their life- what are they gonna say?
Talk about an awkward pause.

There is something sustaing in the very agitation tat accompanies the first shocks of trouble, just as an acute pain is often a stimulus, and produces an excitement which is transient strength. It is in the slow, changed life that follows- in the time when sorrow has become stale, and has no longer an emotive intensity that counteracts its pain- in the time when day follows day in dull unexpectant sameness, and trial is a dreary routine;- it is then that despair threatens; it is then that the preemptory hunger of the soul is felt, and eye and ear are strained after some unlearned secret of our existence, which shall give to endurance the nature of satisfaction.

George Eliot
Excerpt: The Mill and the Floss

The NBA has banned tights.
Thank you Jesus for getting (albeit just once) into the head of David Stern.
Those things look freaking ridiculous and this from a cyclist who wears, well- you’ve seen us.
Now if they can just ban players with absolutely NO fundamental skills then they just might be making some progress.

Since I live in Southern Illinois and my daily rides consist of me on the back, country roads around my house. They’re nice and peaceful, but full of hills. Hills that are all over the place. I’m usually changing gears about once every 45 seconds. I don’t mind it all that much, the way I figure they’re making a man out of me.
However it is a little disheartening to go all of 18 miles and feel like you’ve just run a marathon. Granted, my legs and stamina are still in their road riding infancy, but none the less I’m in e-mail contact with guys who do 150+ miles a week and I think “damn.”
Enter my job, and how I’m lucky.
I have this great job as a shipping supervisor the Midwestern distribution center of a major electronics retailer. Due to propriorty reason I probably shouldn’t tell you which retailer, but there are so many Circuits in this place it’s like there’s a whole City of them.
Anyhoo, it’s a big place, and with that there’s a big ‘road’ that surrounds it (for all the outbound and inbound trucks). How big? Almost exactly one mile in circumference.
You see where I’m going with this?
I asked my General Manager (who is one of the best bosses in the history of bosses) if I could may stop by on Saturdays (when we don’t ship and therefore have very little truck traffic) and ride the loop.
“Sure” he said, and today I took him up on the offer.
Here’s what I got-
-An open road, with very little traffic (any trucks that come in must obey a 5mph speed limit).
-An almost entirely flat surface. There are a few elevations for water run off but nothing noticeable.
-A track that’s almost exactly one mile.
-Since I’m no more than ½ mile from my stuff, I can strip the bike down to its essentials. No need to lug any tools, cell phone etc.
-Due to the lack of traffic I can listen to that iPod as long as I want.
-Really, not much of a need for a helmet, but I’ll wear one just to stay used to it.
It’s like I got my own personal velodrome.
The only downside is that since it’s an open space the wind is terrible. If the weather states that it’s 5mph, then you should brace for every bit of 15. But it keeps things interesting. The other downside is that the scenery is boring at best, but for once a week, no problems.

I totally floored myself today. I rode for just about 2hrs and did 30 miles exactly. That floors me. 30 miles. May not be mean much to the seasoned guys but I can hardly believe it. I wasn’t really all that winded either; just my legs were giving out. I did some rough climbing the day before so I wasn’t as rested as I should have been. But none the less I’m damned proud of myself. This actually makes me believe that I am perfectly capable of doing a century (but not on this track, I’d instead like to do it the ‘real’ way.) My goal is to gain 10 miles per month. We’ll see huh?

God I love riding.

Both Kerry Wood and Mark Prior have been placed on the 15 day disabled list.
Shit
Why, why do I insist on being a Cubs fan? It would be different if I lived say, North of Champaign, but I live less than two hours from St. Louis. Hell, I lived in St. Louis. I’ve been to only one game (one beautiful game) at Wrigley and countless games at Busch.
I suppose it was that first time that I saw Dunston to Sandburg (and later to Grace), or the 4 D threat of Dunston, Durham, Davis and Dawson.
I dunno, but either way I’ll continue to stand by my team. That’s what it’s all about huh?

Yep, opening day is mere hours away, and once again all life on this earth will have meaning.